The Menopause Story Educators Aren't Being Told
It was the exhaustion that got me. Every day felt like a battle, getting through my morning routine, heading out the door to work and then realizing I still had the whole day ahead of me. It was 8:30 a.m. and I was already exhausted.
At first, I thought it was the impact of working in a school system that had been turned upside down by COVID. Watching the toll the pandemic and the months spent in digital learning had taken on all the people in the education system was devastating. Students were dysregulated. Educators were stretched beyond capacity. The pace, the expectations, the emotional load – it all felt relentless.
Then came the rage. I was angry all the time. Not just irritated, but furious. The kind of anger that felt like a wildfire consuming my thoughts, reactions and relationships.
Then the physical symptoms began. My hair was falling out. My shoulder developed a tremor that made it difficult to pick things up with my right hand. I felt like I had woken up in the body of a stranger. The strategies that had once helped me regulate and move through my day no longer worked, and I had no idea why.
And then there was the crying. I was crying in my car every day. For months. Until one day, I had a panic attack at school. I somehow made it to the bathroom, the only place where I could fall apart without an audience. I knew in that moment this wasn’t sustainable. It was going to be me or the job. Both were not going to survive.
What I didn’t know at the time was this: while I was working in an incredibly demanding public education system, I was also in perimenopause, and I didn’t even know it.
What I know now is that I was not falling apart. I was moving through a significant biological transition in a culture that had given me almost no language for it and a workplace that had no idea what to do with it.
The Silent Transition No One Prepared Us For
As educators, we teach puberty as a critical life stage. We prepare young people for the beginning of reproductive life. But nowhere in our curriculum do we meaningfully teach how that story evolves over time.
Perimenopause, the transition leading up to menopause, can begin years before a person’s final period and is driven by hormonal shifts that affect sleep, mood, cognition, joints, metabolism and the nervous system. And yet, most of us are walking into it without any information.
In her book Nourishing Menopause, Andrea Donsky outlines more than 103 documented symptoms associated with perimenopause and menopause. One-hundred-and-three. Let that land.
Most of us were given the world’s shortest menopause orientation: hot flashes, night sweats, end scene. Meanwhile, mid-life humans are out here wondering why we are exhausted, anxious, foggy, ragey, weepy, achy, itchy and suddenly unable to remember the name of the person we have worked beside for 10 years.
Yes, there are the more commonly recognized symptoms: fatigue, disrupted sleep, anxiety, mood swings, brain fog, joint pain, heart palpitations, hot flashes and irregular periods. But the symptom picture can get a lot stranger than most people realize. Your ears itch for no reason. You smell smoke or burnt plastic, and no one else smells a thing. You suddenly have puberty-level body odour. Your gums suddenly become more sensitive, or your dental health shifts in ways you didn’t see coming.
This is where the silence does real damage. Because when no one has told you perimenopause can show up like this, you don’t think, Ah yes, a hormonal transition. You think, What on earth is wrong with me?! That question lands hard, especially in education, where we are expected to be consistently competent, emotionally regulated and mentally sharp from the moment the bell rings.
So, when your body starts changing without your consent, and without a manual, it can feel really destabilizing. That is not weakness. That is not failure. That is a body in transition in a culture that still refuses to teach women what to expect from it.
The Cost of Not Knowing
Across Canada, women are leaving the workforce at the height of their experience and leadership. The Menopause Foundation of Canada reports that one in 10 women may leave their jobs due to unmanaged menopause symptoms, and that these symptoms cost the economy an estimated $3.5 billion annually. And still, we’re not talking about it.
In education, the loss is even more profound. We are losing experienced educators, mentors, leaders and system thinkers at a time when the system desperately needs stability and wisdom.
And here’s the part we’re really not talking about: many are not leaving. They’re staying, and they are struggling. They are showing up every day, teaching, leading, supporting, while quietly managing symptoms that affect their cognition, emotional regulation and physical stamina.
And here’s the part we’re really not talking about: many are not leaving. They’re staying, and they are struggling. They are showing up every day, teaching, leading, supporting, while quietly managing symptoms that affect their cognition, emotional regulation and physical stamina.
This is what it can look like in a school:
- Forgetting words mid-lesson
- Avoiding meetings due to emotional surges
- Functioning on chronic sleep deprivation
- Managing physical symptoms in environments that offer no flexibility
These are not performance issues, they are health realities. And when we misname them, we mismanage them.
Understanding Menopause: More Than a Moment
Menopause is officially defined as 12 consecutive months without a menstrual period. But the transition, perimenopause, can last from four to 10 years. This is not a moment, it is a significant physiological transition.
Perimenopause is the mirror to puberty. Think back to that time in your life, how tired you were all the time, how emotional, how hungry! Our bodies are experiencing the same level of transformation now, only this time, we are the ministers of infrastructure for the lives we have created.
And yet, culturally, this transition remains largely invisible. Without education, people interpret symptoms as personal failure rather than biological change. In a profession already defined by care and overextension, this “push through” mentality can be especially harmful.
A Nuanced Conversation About Hormone Therapy
Menopause hormone therapy (MHT) is one of the most effective treatments for many symptoms, including hot flashes, night sweats and sleep disruption. And yet, the reality is more nuanced and the conversation remains deeply polarized. MHT is not appropriate for everyone, but for many, it can be life changing. What matters most is access to accurate information, informed choice and a skilled healthcare practitioner, not fear-based decision-making.
What’s Happening in Our Workplaces
Most workplaces, including schools, are not designed with menopause in mind. We have built systems around bodies that are expected to be consistent, predictable and unchanging. But women’s bodies change.
In education, this shows up in environments that offer little flexibility, high cognitive demand and limited opportunity to give our bodies the time they need to rest and heal. Without awareness, educators can internalize these challenges as personal failures, rather than recognizing them as body-level transformations that different woman will experience in their own way.
This is where leadership matters.
The Case for Menopause- Informed Policy
Menopause-informed policy isn’t about performative support; it’s about designing workplaces for bodies that change. It’s also about retention, sustainability and equity.
Menopause-informed policy includes:
- Flexible scheduling where possible
- Access to temperature-controlled environments
- Clear accommodation pathways
- Professional learning for staff and leadership
We are already seeing what real menopause leadership looks like when systems decide to respond. Australia’s federal public service has begun formally supporting employees through perimenopause and menopause, recognizing the real impact on retention, participation and career progression. And in the U.K., the direction is even clearer, through the Employment Rights Act (2025), large employers are required to implement and publish menopause action plans, shifting this from optional support to embedded workplace strategy. This isn’t fringe, it’s a coordinated response to a predictable workforce reality.
For unions like ETFO, there is an opportunity to lead by advocating for a membership that is predominantly women and that will ultimately be going through this transition at some point in their careers.
We Are Not the Problem
For too long, menopause has been framed as something to manage quietly. But the problem is not menopause; the problem is the lack of awareness, support and structure around it.
Those of us in mid-life are not declining, we are evolving. We bring experience, leadership, emotional intelligence and perspective. I think back to that version of me, sitting in my car, crying, convinced I was falling apart. I wasn’t. My body was changing. And I had no framework to understand it.
How many are feeling the same way? Our organizations can’t afford to keep losing us – to silence, to stigma, to systems that were never designed for bodies that change.
We deserve workplaces that see us and value the depth of our wisdom, experience and skill.
A better way forward already exists. What’s needed now is system-level knowledge in action, so better becomes how work actually works.
Lisa Boate is a former ETFO member. She is a menopause consultant and coach, and founder of Liberated Menopause.
The Core Four: Foundations for Feeling Better
While menopause is inevitable, suffering through it without support is not. There are four foundational areas, the “Core Four,” that can significantly improve quality of life:
Sleep: Sleep disruption is one of the most common and debilitating symptoms. Prioritizing rest is essential.
Nutrition: Balanced meals support energy, mood and hormonal stability.
Movement: Strength training supports bone density, muscle mass and mental health.
Stress Management: A sensitive nervous system requires intentional regulation; this is not optional.
These are not quick fixes, they are foundational supports. The Core Four are the foundation of mid-life well-being, but this isn’t about choosing one path over another. Lifestyle shifts and hormone therapy are not competing options, they’re part of the same conversation. In fact, many now consider hormone therapy a fifth pillar of menopause support, one that works alongside the Core Four to create a more complete, individualized approach.
Lisa's Top 10 Menopause Resources
1. Transforming 45: youtube.com/@Transforming45 Honest conversations about mid-life, menopause, identity and what comes next. New episodes drop every Thursday.
2. Nourishing Menopause by Andrea Donsky: Research-informed and refreshingly comprehensive – including over 100 documented symptoms most people have never been told about.
3. The Menopause Manifesto by Dr. Jen Gunter: A no-nonsense, evidence-based guide that challenges misinformation and gives women back informed choice.
4. Ontario Menopause Standards of Care: hqontario.ca/Evidence-to-Improve-Care/Quality-Standards/View-All-Quality-Standards/Menopause A critical framework for improving how menopause is understood and treated within our health-care system.
5. Menopause Foundation of Canada: menopausefoundationcanada.ca Leading national advocacy and pushing menopause into workplace and policy conversations across the country.
6. Estrogen Matters by Dr. Avrum Bluming and Carol Tavris: estrogenmatters.com A must-read re-examination of hormone therapy that challenges decades of outdated fear.
7. The Menopause Brain: themenopausebrain.com Essential for understanding the cognitive and neurological shifts of menopause.
8. The New Perimenopause by Dr. Mary Claire Haver: Accessible, practical and widely referenced – helpful for women just starting to connect the dots.
9. The Good Self app: goodself.com A first-of-its-kind social platform connecting users with vetted experts, credible information and a supportive community – because navigating menopause shouldn’t mean sorting through misinformation alone.
10. Liberated Menopause: liberatedmenopause.ca Real-world support to help you navigate menopause at work and in life – with strategy, advocacy and language that actually lands.
